Before the grands get outta school update............

Been getting gardening chores and updos done. We are fixing up the front patio. I will post the befores and afters real soon. Found some amazing old barn wood at our local ReStore run by Habitat for Humanity. Lots of character and stories to tell, that's what this wood brings to our project. When my folks built this house in 1961, it was to have been my Mom's dream home. She never dreamed that my Dad would make her do without so many finishings that made the house special, when it came right down to it. It was just how he was, always had to twist the situation. So I am finally putting the finishings on the entrance to the home. Hopefully my Mom would be proud, although she wasn't really a fan of rustic, I bet she'd sit out on the patio now with a glass of sweet tea and a good book and enjoy the summer breeze and see the completion of her dream done with my aesthetic.

On to the grands and their summer plans. Ry is going to be going to "his" summer program again. He just loves the director of the site where he will attend. Zander has been a huge part of Ry's growth as a proper boy with a sense of self. This will be Ry's 3rd year at Therapeutic Recreation and he is so excited. This year he will be attending without his sister.

GK last year served as a honorary counselor to the youngest kids. She was enrolled in the program but it was soon apparent that she would be more useful to the little ones instead of breaking up fights with the olders. So that is what she did. She fell in love with the Down's Syndrome kids and enjoyed being with them and found a niche with a special group of sweet youngsters. But that is not to be this year. She was told at the end of last year that she would be able to do the honorary counselor position again, but because of liability issues, that is not the case. She will have to wait for a year and then apply for the job when she is 14. Needless to say she was bummed but, we will persevere. There are lots of scenarios of fun and learning that she and I can be involved in and maybe not cause too much trouble for the citizens.

Ry's last day at school was yesterday. Field Day is always his best day and he came home wet and happy. GK's last day is Friday. Then, we will have two weeks until Ry's program starts. Our plan is to take the grands (SM and I) to the Four Corners area of NM. NM, Colorado, Utah and Arizona all come together there. You can stand in four states at once.....sorta. Anyway there are so many wonderful Native American sites to see and many things to do......so the Cuckoos are flying north for a small in-state vacay.

just love the way the different chains play off each other, the texture is so cool

this is a necklace and is simple and yet stylin'

there is a petroglyph on the western side of Albuquerque that is the spiral, one tale indicates the direction of the spiral is the direction the Native Amercians were going....sorta like a road map. This bracelet won't help keep you from getting lost but I love the spiral.

I have been working on my, pay it forward arting items. I made some jewelry that includes paper clips as part of the design both intact and as fasteners. I also have wanted to try making my own fabric with paper. So this begs the question is it faper or pabric? I used dryer sheets as the base on this particular try. I incorporated tissue paper and light weight brown paper bags. I used matte Mod Podge. The faper/pabric came out very much like plastic sheeting. I was able to sew on it, stain it, stamp on it and manipulate it. Made for cute roofs for the paper bird houses I made.

I think next time, I will use muslin and a different kind of glue and see how that turns out. And after my attempts with the paper clips and paper, Ms. GK requested some "fun" colored paper clips to work with. So  I guess we will see what happens with all that.

the wrinkled texture of the pabric/faper is super

Hope your plans for the early summer bring you joy and adventure, Oma Linda

The Casa de Cuckoo philosopher does it again...............

My love for the inside, outside, upside down genius of Casa de Cuckoo, RyLeigh the wonder boy, increases exponentially. He is amazing, puzzling, and enlightening every day. How he is hard wired for funny is also thrown into the mix.

When SM was home last Friday, I got upset with the kids for running late and told Ry, you better hurry up or I'm gonna have to spank your buttcheeks (as if). It's a threat I have never had to use more than once to get him in gear but one I also will never act upon. As Pops took them to school, Ry with a very vexed look on his face, says to SM, "I need to talk to you about your wife." SM said it took all he had not to bust out laughing. And explained to Ry that he needed to listen and hurry when instructed and also that I was just using it as a motivator. Ry explained that he could be motivated in other ways like offering him cookies......yeah me too. (tell me that didn't make you giggle) But at least Ry feels okay to voice his opinion, right?

this work is by lisananni.net

He and I share a birthday as you know. He has a mind like a steel trap, albeit with some major holes in the logic and retention part, as you may or may not know. His autism allows him to know every tiny detail of something with which he is bonded  (Star Wars at the moment) but get lost in the day to day of taking medicine, brushing teeth, getting dressed. You know, the basics. He's a goose and it's a brand new day and that's just the way it is. We here at the Casa have compared it to the movie "50 first dates". Being an adult to this kid, you find yourself repeating some scenarios many, many times of a morning before school. And yet if you forget something (like reading 7MSN blog), why Ry is the first to remind you of your misstep. And no, he is not playing us....he is very typical, nontypical. He's a dry, non dryer. tee hee

Anyway, Mr. Ry paid me the highest compliment in the world on Saturday. Without seeing what the other is wearing, often on Saturdays we end up with the same color clothing. We end up being "twinks", look alikes. So when I came out on Saturday with a light blue t shirt and jeans and he had on a light blue t shirt and jean shorts, he says to me. "Oh look Oma, we did the twinks thing again". Aren't we a pair? Then he says, "we share our birthday, our fashion sense (way to much Project Runway for him) and isn't it great that we share our autism too?"

What a kid. He makes me cry with pride.

Oh Happy Day.......

when I thought I knew what the score was, someone changed the game.

I have come to expect a low key response by my daughter and grands for Mother's Day. It's kinda how we roll most of the time for most occasions around the Casa de Cuckoos. But I'll tell ya what, you could have knocked me over with a feather when Ms. GK for the very first time in her entire life responded to a holiday with an individualized effort. She made her Mom and I breakfast this morning, sans anyone else's assistance.

She proudly proclaimed, "see, I've been watching" as she served what are loving called Oma toasty eggs, which are basted eggs on toast. She also served sliced fruit and coffee. No one prompted her. And she was as surprised as we were. How darned cute is that?

Shelley's response to her was, "well kiddo at least we know that you won't starve if left to your own devices, and that's huge". GK just beamed and sat and watched us eat every bite.

I know some of you are saying, my kid did that lots earlier in their development. Well I say, yah for you. The wanta does, just infected our kids and they both acted on it. Ry made his Mom presents and then wanted her to put them on before she had even gotten a chance to get out of bed. He is usually wound up in the mornings but this was "get out the pole and peel him from the ceiling" day, because he was so excited to do something nice for his Mom.

It's one thing to have your grandmother urge you to make something so that you don't disappoint her daughter but it is another to have GK say when I asked what are we going to make for your Mom, "Oma, we've got this". Hallelujah, they get it and they got it on their own. No chiding, no coercing, no faux attempts. They were motivated by their own best intentions in the world......love.

My own girl child bought me chrysanthaMOMs. And we are spending the day, free styling. A little of this, a little of that and GK has assured me she's got dinner all figured out. Oh Happy Day.

So here's to all of those that nurture, Happy Mother's Day.

Confessions of Crafty Witches's had this on Facebook today, yum

Purple Dragon Martini

Ingredients:
3oz vodka
1 1/2oz cranberry juice
1/2oz blue Curacao liqueur
1/2oz sweet and sour mix
1/2oz of 7-Up
2-3 ice cubes

Directions
in blender or food processor all ingredients and blitz 20 to 30 seconds on high speed.
Salt the rim of your martini glass

Pour and Enjoy

Happy World Donkey Day...........

Yep, this is the day.

Donkeys were domesticated long before the horse. Do you  know why? I have read many explanations but I would summarize what I have read by saying, it is because they are more hard wired to interaction with humans. I think it's because they have a sense of humor and like to hang out close to the human beasts who are more than a little interesting.

In the wild, donkeys keep on the move but have a home territory like many other animals. They fall victim to canine and feline predators and do not have a fast get away. Not to say that they cannot haul some *ss when necessary but......they are not very fast in the scheme of the animal kingdom. Domesticated donkey do not loose that natural instinct with canines and many do not tolerate dogs well. But there are always exceptions to the rule.

nope not quite this old. But don't you just love how sweet this is?

The first time I met a donkey, I was 4 years old and visiting my grandfathers 40,000 acre cow/sheep ranch in northern NM. They called the donkey Feo, which in Spanish means ugly, but he wasn't. He was a "typical" brownish grey donkey with the cross on his back, wonderful long ears and the kindest deep brown eyes. His bray was like a squeeky hinge and escalated to a bull horn. He was wonderful.

He had wandered into the recinto (compound) of the rancho and just hung around with a old billy goat, 2 orphan lambs and the yard and barn cats. My grandfather, as gruff as he was to humans, was a softy for animals. He made a special blanket saddle for the grandchildren to use to ride Feo.

My grandfathers lap cat was one of the most spoiled animals I had ever known. All white, long luxurious hair and Aldofo would sit and wait for Papi all day in the rocking chair they shared at night. When he went out to inspect the porch, the other cats gave him a wide berth. He was something to behold. There were lots of white kittens at the ranch because he was "el jefe gato", boss cat.

Anyway back to Feo. He probably was turned out by his owners when they couldn't feed him anymore. Feo, not being a stupid animal, because donkeys are very bright, made his way to the compound where apples, hay, grass and water were plentiful. The younger cousins, who lived on the ranch found him to be a fun playmate and Feo was very affectionate and patient. So when I, the city cousin, visited I was introduced to this lovely little burrito and instantly fell in love. We became fast friends.

I would brush him, rub his ears and sing to him. He would quiver and nuzzle. It was a mutual admiration society. Most all of my time at the rancho for the next 3 summers was spent with the donkey. I learned to be still and let him show me what he wanted. He learned to be patient with a city kid who didn't know the ways of the natural world. By the time I was 7 I was riding him alone, everywhere.

When my cousin got it into his head that he was going to be a rodeo cowboy, I saw first hand how awful it was when a donkey is roped and injured. Stupid boy eventually maimed the donkey and my grandfather could not let him suffer and so put him down. I never did "cotton to my cousin" for that reason alone. So if you ever wonder why I am so against donkey roping it is because I witnessed cruelty and human stupidity as a child. I will never forget Feo and how beautiful, wonderful, soft and gentle he was when given a chance. And how docile he was to the cruelty he had to endure.

And most especially when I hear other donkeys bray, I hear Feo singing his donkey song and I always will.

Ellsworth and GK just enjoying each other

Feo introduced me to a world of the donkey that I shall forever be grateful for being a part of my upbringing and fond childhood memories. That is why, when given a chance, I introduced my grands to the wonderful world of donkeys. They change your thinking. They give you peace. They teach you joy in the moment.

If you have never been around a donkey, take the opportunity. During these crushing lack of resources time,  many folks are having to let their animals go because they can't afford to feed them. There are so many worthwhile donkey rescues all over the world that could use your help to rescue, foster and rehome donkeys.

Happy World Donkey Day.

***my chosen rescue is Lavender Dream Farms and Donkey Rescue. They just added two more beauties to their donkey group.

Notice too please that I can reply to you now right here on the blog. And I shall.

I swore the last time was the last time but....................

GK and Ry are such precious little jewels in the crown of life. But then I am prejudice and proud. They also are tender, exposed souls. Both of these children have suffered such ugly things in their short lives. The least of which is their association with a particularly nasty bunch of evil blood relatives.

I said I would not fling insults on this blog again, the last time I did. And I must explain that this is the only way in which I can "communicate" with them. It is also the way to enlist you to send good healing thoughts and prayers for GK, Ry and my Shelley.

When GK, Ry and their Mom left South Carolina. They came with what they could pack into a U haul. All of the household furniture and items were left with Shelly's now ex, in the hopes that he would pack up all the rest and join them here in New Mexico. And I must say, they all did believe that he would join them. And then they hoped he would join them. And then it became apparent to them he would not.

He chose to stay with his girlfriend and mommy instead. And in my mind, I was sure that he had sold off the things so that he could to pay for rent etc because he wasn't working but I never shared that with any of them. 

The children have asked when they would be getting "their things" from SC. It was ordered by the court and part of the divorce decree that he would send their things to them here in NM. But like many other things he was to do, that was not to be. 

They have been here almost 4 years. Attending therapy for 3 1/2 years. Trying to move on down the road from the horror of their unbelievable ordeal at the hands of blood relatives. I say unbelievable and you all think I mean I can't believe that anyone would harm them......and that is true from my point of view. But what I mean really is that he chooses not believe and has let the children know he thinks they are liars. Now tell me my lovelies, why would children make up a story of sexual abuse? To garner sympathy? To not be able to sleep at night? To fear that the perpetrator would come and hurt them again? They came with their story....it did not happen here but there. I know why he doesn't believe them because he can't. A liar is the last to know what is true.

GK's birthday should have been a celebration of a young girl going into the teen years. It turned out to be a remembered betrayal of neglect, abuse and abandonment. Why? Because for the 4th time, he said he would send her something that she had left behind in SC. 1st it was lost in the mail, then it was returned to him, then he sent it out again, then he would send it soon, and lastly he sent it with her birthday card......which arrived in an envelope....nope, the desired, asked for, promised item which was way too big for an envelope, was not there.

My question has and always will be. When you lie and lie, do you not take note of what you have lied about? Do you not realize that the world is watching? Do you not know that you alone have destroyed any amount of trust that you had from those that listen to you? Do you not know that everyone but you is aware of what and who you are?

I had a shit for a father. He would lie when he could have just as easily told the truth. He purposefully hurt people just because it gave him a feeling of superiority and thought everyone else was stupid. He was cruel because he wasn't even careful about his lying. 

I know what it feels like to not want to be the offspring of that kind of evil human animal. And yes, I do know that I lived that particular scenario so that I could be here with this knowledge to help my grands but I never wanted this for my grandchildren. I never wanted to see them cry because nothing that comes from him is anything but a lie. They are still young enough that they want it to be different and cannot come to grips with the truth of it. That's why they are in counseling. I don't say anything to them for fear of what I would say about him and realize that that too has become a problem. They don't want to make me hurt either so they bottle it up around me.

So we all cried for GK's birthday....together. To believe, to know that your father lies with every breath is to not trust him or yourself. To think that you come from nothing makes you .....question how you could be good. Yes, the grands know that they are loved, respected, held to accountability and cherished here.......and that they are safe, but it does not take this evil ugly burden away. If it were so, I would wave my wand and make it so. Trust me, believe me.....I would. I do not generally practice dark magic.....but I can.

It may seem inappropriate to post this on this blog where we have such joyful, fun filled times but I know that you love my grands too. That you want the very best for the grands, my lovelies, my friends, my strength. That means the world to me. Please hold them in your thoughts and prayers.

GK turns the dreaded 13 on Sunday.................

As horrified/delighted as I am that this is the truth.....my sweet baby granddaughter will be 13 snarky years old on Sunday. Yes, the sweet little pink toed delight of her grandmothers life when she was born, will become a teenager on Cinco de Mayo.

Poor child has endured pinatas, mariachi music and lively celebrations with accompanying foods, drinks and merriment for most of her birthdays. But this year it will be different....the edict was passed down to the adults. She and 10 of her current best friends, which could change in the blink of an eye or at the change of the weather, are going to go bowling. Errrck, screeeetch, sounds of brakes being applied like in the cartoons. What??????

Apparently what was once cool is cool again. Who woulda thunk it? Of course we must remember that I am old and she is 12 going on to ........ live another day but just barely. She and her posse are going to need adult supervision according to the bowling alley (duh). I mean who in their right minds would let that many prepubescent kids be unsupervised??? But then I used to work with kids this age so there is the teacher in me screaming. "oh yeah, I get it". Since Ms. GK wants to have it on a Saturday night because that is so much cooler that during the day and her Mom works a killer shift on Saturdays and will be dog tired, Pop and I are going to go and be cool by staying in the background and not embarrassing her. Her words not mine. But the old saying about waving a red flag in front of a bull isn't lost on this situation. Now I will need to reign in Sweet Man....so make that 12 kids to tend.

I also want to share one of our recent conversations about who she is. She adores school. Has some favorite and quirky teachers and interacts with kids in a "non-dryer" kind of way which makes her alternative. Dryer? I asked. Yeah, you know like I'm not a setting on a dryer, as in normal! So there you have it. When I was in school, one aspired to be normal, average, but not my darling GK she is not a Dryer. Because she has "tended", her little brother with his interesting and loveable quirks, she is also very kind to those that really aren't dryers. There is a young man in her class who is very sensory assaulted all the time. She made him her Natural History Museum partner in their field trip yesterday. He protested saying that he really liked another girl....who in a very dryer like way shuns him. But GK assured him that they would have fun. So he gave in to GK's proposal and they did have a great time.

I can remember when her Mom turned 13 and went to school that morning my sweet little girl and then in the afternoon some other kid showed up instead. It happened just that fast. For GK it happened right after the Science Bowl. It's not a bad thing. She has learned independence and has a mind of her own. I wouldn't want it any other way. But it sure makes for some entertaining and character building time for all of us at Casa de Cuckoo as we all live up to the non dryer status she has given us. We are alternative, dude.

She is still a sweet girl (both of them are) and I will look forward to being a fly on the wall at her party. I don't know these kids, but I know all about them. So it will be interesting to see how the drama du jour plays out.

Asked GK what she wanted for her birthday. She said surprise me. Not a big old list of things but rather "surprise me". We gave her as one of her gifts, a class given by the University of New Hampshire that will be in July. The class is Harry Potter as Story Telling. Harry Potter has been an integral part of GK's life in books, books on tape, movies and she knows it all almost by heart. When the opportunity came to my attention, I asked her if she would be interested and she was so excited. I think she was one of the first to sign up for the class. If you have someone between 4th and 8th grade that you think might enjoy an intriguing look at comparative literature, creative writing, story telling or just love Harry Potter, I recommend you go to this link and just listen to the professor, James Krasner. He is so funny and interesting. I can hardly wait. What, you couldn't possibly have thought I wasn't going to play too??? I love me some Harry Potter. We also have a few other surprises for her that I am sure she will love.

I am so blessed to have the opportunity to be a part of this kind of activity. Don't think I don't realize this. This is the best part of my life....every morning I remind myself of that fact.

These are some of my favorite photos of GK:

look at the toes of excitement all clenched.....

at a Ren Faire being the princess she is destined to be

gorgeous girl

So Happy Happiest Birthday sweet GK, my soul mate and friend from many long agos, and my only grandgirl.

My Mom would have been 95 today............

My mother, Frances Elizabeth West Doss Maes, would have been 95 years old today.

summer 1949 - Mom and me

She has been gone for 11 years now. I spent the first couple of those years, mad as hell at her for leaving me. Leaving me to miss her, to have to contend with my father, to try to figure out who she was and lastly to forgive her for just being who she was with me.

My Mom was a special kind of crazy. When I say that to my grands, GK always says, "then it must run in the family". True. But her kind of crazy had no mirth or joy to it. She was a mystery, so beautiful, very hungry for so many things, fiercely independent, had an anger that scared the bejeezus outta me.

Growing up, I knew she loved me. Cared what happened to me and wanted everyone to know what a good mother she was. There were pockets of "ugly" that she never divulged or acknowledged about her upbringing or mine and it must have been so very hard for her to live happy. I found out more about my Mom after she died by cleaning out my fathers papers after he died than I ever knew when she was alive.

I have worked on my feelings about Mom for a lot of years. I thought I was a disappointment to her, found out she raved about me to any and all who would listen. I didn't know that. She thought I had talent and wanted everyone to see my work. I didn't know that. When I had Shelley, she fell in love with her and I felt like an outsider. Now that I am a grandmother, I understand what they had and why. But at the time, I didn't know that.

She hated me for being her caregiver during the last year of her life, but she also clung to me for everything. I know now it wasn't me she hated. She didn't want to die. And she was mad at the world and mean to me but I should not have taken it personally. But at the time, I did not know that.

I miss her. I love her. I wish we would have had a do over. I would have loved to really know her heart, help her see herself differently. I wish she would have seen Shelley grow into a wonderful mother. I wish she would have been able to know GK and Ry and share in the pride of what good kids they are. I wish she could have known me better, warts and all.

Happy Birthday Mom. In death you taught me so much more about myself and who I am. You gave me the chance to perceive you in a much different way....and appreciate the struggles that made you the person you were.

If I had a moment with you, I'd say "you did good by me". You gave me what I needed to be "a special kind of crazy" too, and know how to laugh and wish you would have been able to enjoy life more.

Everything we are is because of what we have gone through, good or bad. Consider everything as a lesson that you had to learn in order to be who you were intended to be. Gold is refined by fire, so are we. This is the lesson I learned most especially over the past 11 years. And now I know.

May day wishes............

I know I have told you my childhood story of May day and celebrating with dancing around the maypole at school but I will tell my tale again.

It was during the McCarthy era in America and I was just a first grader. I had come to public school after a run in with the nuns of St. Vincent's Academy for Girls over the dreaded eating of the green beans everyday at lunch debacle.

This incident happened because my Baptist raised Mom didn't know that Catholics did not eat meat on Friday and dared to send me with a sack lunch with bologna on the 2nd Friday in September. The principal, the lovely and sinister,  Sr. Mary Claire had declared her fellow nuns "friends of Zorro" (my thoughts not her words) were to take my lunch sack and I was to be detained at lunch and eat what was being served in the cafeteria.

I didn't like green beans and so left them on my plate. Next day I was given a lecture regarding the poor starving children of the world and was made to eat more green beans, which I politely declined and  left for said children. I told them I would have like to send the green beans to those poor unfortunate children but they did not agree with me. The next day, I again was blessed with a mess of green beans and nothing else. So on the fourth day of green bean torture when the bell rang, I threw up on my teacher, the ruler wielding, Sr. Mary Geraldine. Of course I was sent to the principal, my good buddy Sr. Mary Claire. She proceeded to pull down my underpants and whip me with a paddle, every day for the next week.

It took 2 weeks of this, my stubbornness and being told that I was evil to bring the incident to the attention of my mother. The girls I had grown up with and were neighborhood friends, who were my classmates declared that they could no longer ride in the car home with me because I was evil. They had no choice but to say this because Sr. Mary Geraldine told the girls of my class not to be associated with anyone who defied the nuns (like me and my evil non green bean eating self).

My Mom carpooled with the other mothers and it was her turn when the girls made this announcement. My Mom marched her Irish tempered self into the school leaving us in the car.

When she came back out, I was the first ever voluntary dis enrollment from the highly esteemed St. Vincent's Academy for Girls and thus began my public school life. I stayed home for a couple of days and my Mom tried to convince me that I was not evil and that no nuns (not really friends of Zorro) would be at my new school.

She was quite right. I had the most understanding and kind teacher. Her name was Mrs. Sandman and she forgave me for throwing up for the first week when the lunch bell rang and was ever so wonderful to me.

So when at the "almost end of school" May day celebrations came and I had made it through first grade and had friends and ate my bologna sandwiches at my desk everyday and did not have one other meeting with the principal with a paddle, I was thrilled.

I thought that it was a perfect acknowledgement of the good times I had come to know at Lew Wallace Elementary school. The colorful ribbons blowing gently in the breeze, the games on the lawn, the laughter and joy all seemed like a celebration for me and my school.

But Mr. McCarthy changed all that and said it was a communist celebration and that no good American would celebrate May Day. So that was the only year we had a Maypole dance or party at public school. But it has always stayed in my memory as a delightful celebration.

Sheesh. Grown ups and their believes, it's why I have never aspired to become one.

Oh where have you been darling Oma????????????

I have been absent from Blogger. I can't explain why, I just have. Instead my "me" time has been spent on Pinterest. Enjoying what others find meaningful, fun, entertaining. Adding to my files of stuff.

Pinterest has been compared to virtual hoarding. I would have to agree. I have also read that others have had to cease doing Pinterest because it causes them such anxiety from seeing things they once had, in a redone way and regretting not holding on to said "thing" so that they could do the redo to the "thing". Wow, that was a mouthful of illogical thought. But one unfortunately I "used to could" understand.

I find things on Pinterest I once had; toys, clothes, furnishings and it brings up a smile and a feeling of "oh yeah, I remember those, or that". I also have to admit that it is a bit like hoarding. I can put all the polka dotty things in the the world in my "what's red, white and gnome all over" file and enjoy going back and seeing it. Or I can go to "love us some donkeys" and see so many beautiful donks enjoying life. I also have files that affords me the opportunity to dream. So for me Pinterest is a positive. And also a mind numbing distraction and frankly, that isn't all so bad.

As to regret......well for some reason that is on many peoples minds and blogs as well. Regret is a terrible thing. And I was gifted by my upbringing with what I call my guilt bead necklace. If there was something that made me feel guilty, regretful, missing out, I'd pick up that sucker and put it on my necklace like the old pop bead style necklaces.

I just kept adding things. It was my style until I had an epiphany about 4 years ago. I realized that the things I was missing were only shadows of a real issue. I needed to forgive myself for things I had done wrong or missed out on and also to let myself off the hook for things that had never been my fault to begin with. It took me an entire year to get on down the road and rid myself of the necklace.

I felt ashamed, angry and hurt most of the time. I was defensive, curt, harsh and had ragged edges when it came to blame. I wanted things to be pure, rectified, cleansed, and set the record straight. And then I came to the spot in the road where I had to ask myself, "do you want to be right or do you want to be happy"?

Well the answer to that question is still up for debate from day to day. When it comes to myself....I will vote for happy and let the rest fall by the wayside. When it comes to those that I love.....there's more of a "get it right" for their sake attitude. When it comes to the world at large........I have no control but that doesn't mean I am not a participating member of a wider community of humans. And as such, I have responsibility to help when and where I can. There is where wisdom comes into play.....when I can, where I can. I can't let myself be swept away in fear and anger. I can't judge something based on someone else's point of view without further investigation on my part but I also don't have to dwell on the negative. That is what leads me down the path to blame and all those guilt charms just waiting to be picked up and popped on the necklace.

There are issues in every one's lives that bring them to sorrow. Everyone has their own set of hurts and pains. Mine are not any more important that anyone else, however they are mine and I feel them, therefore they are real to me. I cannot compare mine to anyone else and I cannot take from anothers set of woes. We are all allowed our own feelings. Or at least we should be. But don't diminish mine just because you've never stepped into my shoes. Or you fail to notice that I am, like you, a valid person.

That's a rather simple statement but I feel like I need to state that here, now.

And yet that is not the reason I have been absent. I just need(ed) time away. Time to give to me and mine. Time to regroup and dream new dreams with happier endings and less "beadwork".

Namaste

Smooches and Squoozes, Oma Linda

So we're abandoning the fort.............

Well not really but it feels like it.

We bought this for Ms. GK when she was 3. She will be 13 in a few weeks. When they all left and went to live in SC they gave it to friends whose kids enjoyed it for three years. And when Shelley and the grands came back the friends returned it to them.

It has been in the backyard here for the last 3 years....and I can't tell you how many adventures were created, played out and enjoyed on this fort/playhouse/spaceship/pirate vessel/olympic winners platform/place to be alone. It has been a joy and now it needs to bring joy to younger (lighter in weight)  kids who can make their own adventures.

When Ry first got here he spent alot of time on this fort....just finding his way in this environment, looking for pirates on the horizon. GK has used this for just about everything imaginable from princess rescues to factory for making fairy building bricks. We are all sad to see it go but happy that it has another chance to bring on the imagination and fun times for someone else.

Gosh the time goes by so very fast.

This was 4 years ago.

This one of my favorite photos last spring

Splendor House and a giveaway...........

Hello Lovelies: As there are some of you who do not follow any of my other blogs, I feel compelled to let you know that I have been helping Ms. Magaly of Pagan Culture celebrate her 4th year blogaversary with a two week event called Witches in Fiction - to the Bone.

This is a picture of the snapping turtle pelvis which I decorated to make the dragon mask for Splendor House. He makes me grin with his composite self. Headress from China, eyes from Greece, beard & tongue from Egypt, glass ears and bell teeth from India and the turtle shell from Georgia. He's quite a funny little guy.

I wrote a 7 Chapter story entitled Splendor House. I have posted every other day starting April 1 and I will post Chapter 7 the end of the tale on April 13th. I have had some interesting comments and guesses as to how the mystery will end. I also have had some "disgruntled" (but not really) readers who did not like the cliff hangers and the break between chapters. 

I must admit, I don't think I will do that again. I was as anxious as many of the readers. I can't stand the waiting either. So I came to the conclusion that I should use yet another of my blogs Bell, Book and Candledrippings as the location that I will place all my "novellas", serials and articles that I have written, and also for anymore challenges or blog parties that come my way. So beginning on May 1, I will launch Bell Book and Candledrippings and all of my written work will be there for you to read (complete stories even). The gypsy Cybella's tale as well as the other fantasy pieces will be included.

Now to the giveaway part of this post. On April 8th on Pagan Culture, Ms. Magaly offered my altered book "prieres squelette" - Skeleton Prayers (here's the link to that post). The inspiration for this altered book was the image of a skeleton praying....what would he/she ask for? I think the cover answers that for me. The skeleton would pray for life, blood, essence, not just bones. I used Graphics Fairy's picture frame on this piece.

If you follow the link you can see not only my sponsor item but those of others. There are so many different kinds of offerings and I know you will love them. The drawings for all will be April 17th, I believe.

Happy Weekend, Smooches and Squoozes, Oma Linda

RyLeigh was 9 years old yesterday. He was so excited about his birthday that he was a little on the "out there" side of life. I remember being like that. In fact, I remember my Mother, the kind and gentle, Frances the feared, taking me aside on my 8th birthday while all the rest of my girlfriends were having cake and ice cream and spanking me. Because I was out of control....I'm sure beating my butt made it oh so much better, what with the crying and all. I also remember not wanting to finish the birthday ordeal and telling the kids to take their presents home with them. Wow, now that's what I call a memory.

Anyway back to the cute little boy who lives here....he received all the stuff he asked for as far as Angry Birds/Star Wars and Mario was concerned. Balloons, cake, the whole song and dance was done in funny looking round birds with helmets or cinnamon buns on their heads. See.............

A very happy boy.

And I was a very happy olde broad. I got flowers from my dear friend Ms. Maddy, lovely funny cards from so many of you my lovelies, lots of email wishes, an ACEO "First Snow" (which is cute because it did snow yesterday, only I hope it's our Last Snow) from Ms. Stacey and polka dotty mushrooms of the wool felted variety from Ms. Kim. Each and every wish, card and gift was a joy to me.

These are from Maddy

I must confess that I bought myself some flowers too. Most of the time, since I normally buy what I want, I don't get birthday gifts. And so I thought, gee, I think I would like to surprise myself with flowers.....and so I did. The surprise was on the rest of the family when they arrived at the door, followed by the delivery of flowers by Maddy. I don't want you to think that the fam didn't buy me a gift. They did. We got a white fleshed peach tree when we went to the nursery with the grands. It will keep on giving, year after year. And Shelley and the Grands found this fabulous card that has ruby slippers that glow and the card plays "Somewhere Over the Rainbow".

I went out today and found a couple of publications that I've been interested in investigating and also bought some new incense and some woo woo candles. Today was my "just for me" day. I know, I'm shameless.

Smooches and Squoozes, Oma Linda

Just getting around to telling about our latest donkey visit.....

Most of the time when we visit with our donkey friends, the date has been arranged for some time. Like everyone else, we all are "heavenly" bodies with assigned orbits and every once in a while we can schedule time together. But this time it just happened.

So on Easter Sunday, the Cuckoos went to Morning Bray Farm to pick up some duck eggs and to deliver a very special blanket.

Morning Bray Farms ducks are laying copious numbers of eggs. I have only had duck eggs once while I was visiting with my Aunt in Tennessee many, many years ago. And when asked if I'd like some, I was very excited to take Justina up on her kind offer. As Justina gave us the eggs, Ry put his ear up to the eggs and said, "I don't hear any peeping". Of course the grands aren't gonna have a thing to do with them. Especially when they kinda got the idea that the eggs would contain J & D's grand ducks. But they won't have to know they are in the egg bread that they have had this week or the pineapple upside down cake they ate last night. I won't tell.

Anyway, the blanket is one that I bought online several years ago. It is a Columbian donkey blanket used by donkeys to carry flowers and other "tourist trade" items or in processions. I bought it long before I even knew any donkeys. I got it for my Saint Bernard Murphy. I was training him to pull a cart and the blanket was perfect because I put bottles of water in the side pockets and kept adding weight so that he would build up strength to pull. I would walk him all over the neighborhood and we always had folks stop us and say how pretty he looked. He loved that. Even though we trained for a long time, he was never able to manage pulling the cart. He always thought something was chasing him.

Bernard just wanted to eat the blanket.....

I thought I had purged the blanket along time ago. But as I was going through boxes in the garage of my Mexicana to sell, I found it in with some other wonders that I have collected. I contacted Justina when I relocated it and asked if she would like the blanket. I could just envision the Cinco de Mayo Donkey get together being enhanced by said blanket.

Ellsworth is an old hand with stuff on his back, what a handsome boy he is

It has been awhile since we have seen this wonderful herd of donkey. I just can't explain well enough what a joy it is to be with the donkeys. Each has their own personality. Each has their level of interaction and that is different with each of us. This was Ry's day with the donkeys. Most times, Ry is so over the top that the donkeys keep a certain distance but this time they all interacted with him. GK just walks among them as though she is a donkey as well.

Patrick loved being the "Burrito" with the blanket, what a sweet boy he is. You never suspect his awful life before he came to MBF

This was my first time meeting the newest, Ms. Harriet. She is a darling, friendly donk. Loves to give a body a chest nudge. With my old legs, I have to stay on the outside of the corral for fear that I will lose my balance when they donkeys nudge and with Ms. Harriet it was a good thing. She's a very enthusiastic nudger. I so enjoy my time with them and watching the grands experience these lovely animals upclose and personal is equally enjoyable.

Excuse me Mom, I was gonna play ball with Ry. No blanket please.

Shelley and the grands wandered the farm while I stayed and visited with Justina. I know I have told you how fond I am of her. She is such a warm, sweet soul and always makes us feel so welcome.

Buck is such a pretty color

Nigel was interested in looking at the others with the blanket on, but very alert just in case........

Shelley and GK took the pictures. We didn't get any of the girls. Ms. Gracie Belle & Ms. Harriet, next time perhaps.

Smooches and Squoozes, Oma Linda

Blue for Autism Awareness Day......is April 2

I appreciate each and everyone of you who has through the last four years (almost) encouraged, supported and rah rahed us, at Casa de Cuckoo as we have shared our 3 generation household with you. You've been ever so loving and understanding of my grands and their struggles and successes (and my worries and my boastings). Thanks so very much.

Today has been chosen as the day when the puzzle pieces of autism are viewed not as broken but as precious. Each piece holding a special someone that is loved but needs more understanding and insight into who they are and how they will contribute. Hopefully someday we will put all the pieces together of this puzzle called autism and find what makes our non neural typical children that way. Not broken and needing fixing but differently abled and deserving respect.

For the past few weeks, our precious 8 year old dynamo of complexity RyLeigh, has been going to see a new set of specialists. This was after his med management team seemed to have lost their way in the real world as "there to help him". Shelley sought out new avenues of help.

You know diagnosis for autism is a two edged sword. One the one hand, in order to get the specialized help the child needs you must have a diagnosis. One the other hand diagnosis means a label, for life. And there is, at best, subjectivity involved in the testing and they will always tell you that the tests are not absolute. Which makes me beg the question, but if you are the experts and prescribe the drugs, how can you do so based on an educated guess? Don't you need proof positive before you "do no harm"? Just asking.

But then you know how I feel about doctors.

So the new team of autism specialists did medical tests, blood, urine, reflexes etc. They also did IQ testing and the ADOS tests, which if I told you what they were I would be lying....I have no clue ?????? RyLeigh is who he is. He carefully observed everything about what he had to do for these new people in his life. He was okay with everything except the blood test. He was friendly, polite and sweet according to all who administered any part of the testing. He's a good kid. He's engaging with adults but cannot do so with his peers. He has now reached a road block at school with being teased and excluded based on his being "different". It's hard to watch and so he's bright, happy on the outside and a boiling mass of childhood on the inside.

He has a new diagnosis, which is actually an old diagnosis, PDD NOS. Pervasive developmental delay not otherwise specified. With that said he scored normal on the IQ and is very definitely on the spectrum. And we also found out that "they", the powers that be, are doing away with any verbiage pigeon holing children. Henceforth they will only say that the child is on the spectrum.

Now my reason for writing this post today is because I feel like I owe it to RyLeigh to be his cheerleader and encourager. I also have written this because RyLeigh lets me see other people in a whole different light. So he has been my teacher and eye opener. Our family would not be who we are, know what we know, have the feelings we do about others were it not for our special beautiful boy. He drives me to the nut house everyday, he also fuels my life with joy.

So on this twoth of April, I wanted to share with you, some of the ins and outs of RyLeigh, the resident inside, outside, upside down philosopher of Casa de Cuckoo who still needs special kind folks to cheer him on and he knows that you are in his corner when he says, "hey Oma, are you gonna tell the lovelies about this one of me?"

And so I will. Easter Sunday we went to visit our friends at Morning Bray Farm. While there, RyLeigh, who just adores Don, says to Don, can I show you something? Sure Ry, what is it? Ry says, I wanna give you a peep show. Both Don and Justina looked at Shelley and I with a "what the", look on their faces. We assured them it was okay.
Inside, Ry asks for a paper plate, opens a package of blue peeps, puts one on the plate and asks Don to zap it for 30 seconds. And watch the peep show.
The peep grows ever bigger and Ry is smiling and Don is looking like he's not sure about this thing that might explode in his microwave.
Then they take the now deflating peep out of the microwave. Don't you think that's cool? asked Ry of Don. Uhhhhh, yeah. And off RyLeigh walks to play with the dogs.
Shelley and I were laughing so hard. Uhhhhhh yeah.
Then Shelley told the story of how the blowing up of peeps came into our lives. On the night that she was in labor with Ry, the nurses on the ward were in the break room laughing hysterically. I looked in and one of them said to me, pssssst, ya wanna see a peep show???????
So we blow up peeps every year on or around Ry's birthday as a funny little moment in time that brought to us on the night we got our funny, sweet RyLeigh.

Got any left over peeps from Easter?......put um in the microwave and think of the Cuckoos.

Smooches and Squoozes, Oma Linda

Marching through the Alphabet with James C. Wallace

For those that attended Celebrate Oz, I know you will recognize the name James C. Wallace, The Magician of Oz. Well, he in the month of April, goes about counting down the days, minus Sundays, with an alphabet look at Oz.



I thought I would let you know that he has begun the 2013 version of said event and you are invited.
http://magicianofoz.blogspot.com/2013/04/atozchallenge-auction-album-from-land.html?showComment=1364858871923#c2680377168627822310

Hello Easter bunnies..........

Have you gotten your fair share of jelly beans and chocolate bunnies?

How about colored eggs and peeps?

Bel Monili

We just came inside from doing the great Easter tradition of Casa de Cuckoo. That would be whacking each other in the head with colored eggs.....filled with confetti. In Spanish they are cascarones. In Cuckooeze they are blessing eggs.

In any language they are fun. The blessing is supposed to come when you choose your victim/target and bless them when you smash the egg on their head or shoulder. However, in the hands of inexperienced blessers it can be, if not painful, annoyingly startling. There is an art to cupping your hand and making the impact quick. That way the egg and all the confetti are dispersed widely and painlessly. But for some reason......8 year old boys think they need to grind them into a person's brain. I kept saying Bunny eggs not Zombie eggs. Tee hee.

Oh the squeals and running about and that was just Shelley and me. Yeah right. I should imagine that our neighbors think we've lost our minds....oh never mind, they know we have.

 This is what happens when you run out of eggs and still need to "bless" someone..gather the ground bits.

Hope your day is as fun filled as ours has been and hopefully will be......we're off to get some duck eggs and maybe see an Easter donkey or two.

Smooches and Squoozes, Oma Linda