Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Oh where have you been darling Oma????????????

I have been absent from Blogger. I can't explain why, I just have. Instead my "me" time has been spent on Pinterest. Enjoying what others find meaningful, fun, entertaining. Adding to my files of stuff.

Pinterest has been compared to virtual hoarding. I would have to agree. I have also read that others have had to cease doing Pinterest because it causes them such anxiety from seeing things they once had, in a redone way and regretting not holding on to said "thing" so that they could do the redo to the "thing". Wow, that was a mouthful of illogical thought. But one unfortunately I "used to could" understand.

I find things on Pinterest I once had; toys, clothes, furnishings and it brings up a smile and a feeling of "oh yeah, I remember those, or that". I also have to admit that it is a bit like hoarding. I can put all the polka dotty things in the the world in my "what's red, white and gnome all over" file and enjoy going back and seeing it. Or I can go to "love us some donkeys" and see so many beautiful donks enjoying life. I also have files that affords me the opportunity to dream. So for me Pinterest is a positive. And also a mind numbing distraction and frankly, that isn't all so bad.

As to regret......well for some reason that is on many peoples minds and blogs as well. Regret is a terrible thing. And I was gifted by my upbringing with what I call my guilt bead necklace. If there was something that made me feel guilty, regretful, missing out, I'd pick up that sucker and put it on my necklace like the old pop bead style necklaces.

I just kept adding things. It was my style until I had an epiphany about 4 years ago. I realized that the things I was missing were only shadows of a real issue. I needed to forgive myself for things I had done wrong or missed out on and also to let myself off the hook for things that had never been my fault to begin with. It took me an entire year to get on down the road and rid myself of the necklace.

I felt ashamed, angry and hurt most of the time. I was defensive, curt, harsh and had ragged edges when it came to blame. I wanted things to be pure, rectified, cleansed, and set the record straight. And then I came to the spot in the road where I had to ask myself, "do you want to be right or do you want to be happy"?

Well the answer to that question is still up for debate from day to day. When it comes to myself....I will vote for happy and let the rest fall by the wayside. When it comes to those that I love.....there's more of a "get it right" for their sake attitude. When it comes to the world at large........I have no control but that doesn't mean I am not a participating member of a wider community of humans. And as such, I have responsibility to help when and where I can. There is where wisdom comes into play.....when I can, where I can. I can't let myself be swept away in fear and anger. I can't judge something based on someone else's point of view without further investigation on my part but I also don't have to dwell on the negative. That is what leads me down the path to blame and all those guilt charms just waiting to be picked up and popped on the necklace.

There are issues in every one's lives that bring them to sorrow. Everyone has their own set of hurts and pains. Mine are not any more important that anyone else, however they are mine and I feel them, therefore they are real to me. I cannot compare mine to anyone else and I cannot take from anothers set of woes. We are all allowed our own feelings. Or at least we should be. But don't diminish mine just because you've never stepped into my shoes. Or you fail to notice that I am, like you, a valid person.

That's a rather simple statement but I feel like I need to state that here, now.

And yet that is not the reason I have been absent. I just need(ed) time away. Time to give to me and mine. Time to regroup and dream new dreams with happier endings and less "beadwork".

Namaste

Smooches and Squoozes, Oma Linda


14 comments:

  1. You've said it in a way that I never would be able to. I envy you your gift with words.
    I too have been spending less time blogging but haven't spent it doing much of anything else either. I could blame it on the weather or having nothing interesting to say and maybe both could be reasons for spending time away. I have noticed that it's happening to others too so who knows, maybe this is just a natural progression of things. However it is you chose to spend your time, I hope you're spending it in a way that is good for you and your spirit. S&S

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  2. A very thoughtful post, Oma Linda, on what is important and not important in this life.

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  3. Thank you so much for putting into words what I so often feel but cant express....you are amazing and I am sending you oodles of love
    Kim xxxxx

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  4. Oma Linda, I love you and I would never judge you. You do what you have to do! As long as you are happy and dreaming, that's all I care about ;o) But, I do miss you ;o) Hugs ;o)

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  5. Gosh I hope your "me" time has been fruitful. Isn't it amazing how those beads can get heavy and pull us down if we let them.
    I still haven't tried Pinterest but then I am usually a little late to the table.

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  6. It is good to hear that you are just collecting virtual pretties and spending some time with Oma. We all need those breaks from the norm every now and then.

    "Virtual hoarding" made me giggle ;-)

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  7. Ohh Pinterest, I'm one of those shameful people that only pins what is useful to them from websites and doesn't trawl through all the crap other people have posted. I think one day the Pin-police will hunt me down, but in the meantime, it makes me happy :oD

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  8. As you've seen, since we're both virtual hoarders, I've been doing much the same. Pulling away from the a lot of the virtual life and getting out in to the open air, in to my head and heart and learning to be more in the moment. Taking time to heal and grow and laugh and sleep and just be with me.

    But the hoarding is great, because if I can't sleep or it's slow at work, it sets my mind racing with all manner of wonderful new projects and ideas. And I always love that! xox

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  9. Ever hear that Bob Marley song "Runnin Away"? In it he says "Every man thinks that his burden is the heaviest". We need to all understand that our shoulders are different sizes and the things we carry vary from person to person. A kind of pain threshold. It's all relative.

    Hugs.

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  10. Pinterest is one thing I have avoided thus far. I'm honestly trying to spend less time online instead of more. so I blog less.
    Regrets, yeah, I have some, but I avoid thinking about them and instead take my lessons from them and have moved on. Seems that you have too. That is the healthy way.

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  11. In The Vintage Fairy Tales we always try to move on and leave negative things behind...that's easy in the fairy tales...;)

    I find Pinterest very inspiring indeed, spend more time there nowadays than reading blogs.

    Much love to you my dear friend
    Becky

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  12. You are so right. We all have our tender spots, those places that erupt from the dirt and rust from time to time. Nobody escapes this truth, I don't care what they say. Suffering to varying degrees, feelings of guilt, anger, pain, loss, are all part of the human condition. But so is love, forgiveness, tenderness and peace. It is the latter that I hope for you to replace as time allows. You are a wise and beautiful soul, Miss Oma Linda, and you have NOTHING to feel guilty about. Hugging you tightly, Mina

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  13. Oh I SO get this! And I love Pinterest! Digital hording!!! Going to find you on there now. I get so many good ideas and inspiration from there. There is actually a site called Pinterest Fails!!! Pretty funny stuff. Love, Deb

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