So much has been going on behind the blog for over 6 months now. Good stuff, troubling stuff and regular stuff.
Let's begin with the troubling so it's out of the way. Since last March, in case you weren't around, I have been on high alert emotionally because of medical issues. I had never really worried about not being here in this life before. But six months is a long time to contemplate the possibility. It has worn me down, made the Cuckoos even more so and changed the way we live life.
This morning, I got the final test results and for all the worry I am at this point cancer free. I am truly blessed by the pieces that have fallen into place that led me to this spot in my life. Were it not for my husband, daughter, grands and all of you, my friends, I fear I would be in a looney bin. Support is essential to our existence and I am so appreciative for every card, note, pep talk, tears, love and some good old fashion "get over yourself", that I have received.
The fact that we have new insurance, I have a new primary care doctor who gets me (finally after all the other medical machines) and every single person I met in this process was "beguiled" by my outer calm and kindness. I tried to behave just like I wanted them to treat me and it worked, down to the last one.
I tried to hold up at home as well, but these lovies of mine could "feel" my fear and pain and rallied around me with humor, chiding and love. It's was a hard time met with good behavior and constant reminders that we love each other.
I can honestly say that I am not afraid of dying. It was the thoughts of what my family might have to face in the suspected diagnosis. I also can say that I was afraid of pain of the physical and emotional variety.
We have all been changed by this process. I am so glad that we have. All those lessons will not be lost on us and we will be the richer for the strain. And the wheel keeps on turning.
The best part, is the update on my vow to be more healthy. I have to date lost 13 lbs, don't have swollen ankles, sleep like a champ and my walks are really paying off. Sweet Man and I went to a gym today that I think we will like very much. They offer water aerobics, low impact (one of everything and a side order of something else) classes and all the cardio machines every invented. We are so excited to put on our workouts and go tomorrow.
But the real blessing part of all this, is you. The friends that I have never met (some exceptions) who have been there for and with me. I do so love you all. What you give, you receive, and I know you will all be further blessed by your kindnesses.
Smooches and Squoozes,